Kyuubi Madness
by Morbid Guidance
Summary: Kyuubi trys to escape, but when he fails he finds that he can live through Naruto once a month, but Jiraiya has to watch him with his super watching skills we all know he has. Also, somebody has a crush on Kyuubi and its not who you would think...
1. The Begining

It's the moment you've all been waiting for! MY awesome Kyuubi story has arrived! Nah I'm just kidding you its not awesome, unless you say it is but I'm pretty sure you wont hehe! Well anyway this is why I started fanfiction…to tell you the truth I never intended to show anyone this…. Cause its kinda stupid…so please don't laugh at me, if you need to laugh at me don't write it down, in other words just don't tell me k? Anyway, this is the first fanfic Ive ever done (I know I said this was the first or something on my other fanfics but that was a lie because I didn't think I would ever put this one up).

I don't and never will own the Kyuubi in any way. Which means no naruto either. 

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 1

The Beginning

It was dark, there wasn't a star in the sky. Instead, there was a young ninja, jumping from housetop to housetop at full speed. Chasing him, were five other ninjas. The boy had blond hair and wore an orange and blue jacket and orange pants. He took the appearance of naruto but wasn't really naruto. The one thing different was his small crimson eyes.

"_Damn it all, thoughs blasted humans just never give up!" _He thought frustrated. _"If I can just get myself out of this village and into someplace peaceful, I can get rid of this blasted seal once and for all!"_

"QUICK! STOP HIM!" Yelled one of the ninjas behind him.

"_Pff. Don't they already know that! Why do they need to yell it out again? A bunch of idiot humans!_" He thought to himself angrily while dashing to were ever he thought he was going (this village was huge!). up ahead was the gate to the outside. There was two Japanese letters on them that read A, N whatever that meant. But just as the boy got to the gate, he was ambushed by three of the ninjas who were supposedly behind him. One grabbed his arms from behind him and the other two held him down in the front.

"NO! DAMN IT! AAHH!" He roared very frustrated at this point indeed. He bit the hand holding his arms back. When the last two of the ninjas chasing him caught up, one of them with scars all over his face said…

"I don't know how you got out Kyuubi, but were going to get you back in, how about that for a cup of tea eh?" And he took a huge scroll from his back and with the help of an extremely old geezer started writing stuff onto it.

"_Shit!"_ Kyuubi thought angrily. _"Ive got to do something fast, this might be the only chance I ever get!" _And he bit the hand holding his arms back harder until it drew blood, scar face and geezer of all geezers had just about had the seal on the scroll ready! There was only one thing left to do, although it brought a discussing taste to his demon mouth just to think it. He let go of the hand he had been biting, there was now so much blood that it covered the whole hand. _"Ok." _He thought. _"Here I go…"_

"PLEASE DON'T PUT ME BACK! I DON'T WANNA GO BACK IN!"

The nine tails noticed a hesitation with scar face and old geezer, the three ninja holding him back loosened there grip, just a bit but still loosened.

"I'LL DO ANYTHING! JUST DON'T PUT ME BACK IN THERE! I BEG YOU!"

More hesitation, more loosened grip, but still was not enough.

"I don't know what your planning Kyuubi, but if we let you out you'd just come back to kill us all!" The old geezer said and continued writing on the scroll.

"_No, really?" _Kyuubi thought sarcastically. _"Friggen humans! I hate you all!"_ "N-no I wouldn't." he lied and looked up into the human holding his arms back's face. He had white hair put into a ponytail and looked about in his fifties. They stared at each other for a moment and the fox did his killer puppy eyes face. If he could just get one human on his side….

"Ok." The white hairdo said. Kyuubi nearly fainted hearing these words. But what was the catch? He wondered for a moment if he was just dreaming of escape again and would wake up in that dreaded sewer cage any moment now, Before he realized, the humans were chatting to one another.

"ARE YOU KDDING ME?" Yelled scar face angrily.

"Calm down, you didn't let me finish." Said the white hairdo calmly. "We can let him wake up in naruto once a month. I'll watch him with my super watching skills you all know I have ¬¬."

"Hmm Jiraiyas got a good idea you know Ibiki." The geezer exclaimed. "He might stop trying to escape if he has this privilege."

This was all too good to be true! Being the brat naruto once a month was better then nothing! Then one of the men holding him down had to pipe up.

"But will naruto agree to this?" The man said lazily. This human wore a mask that covered his nose and mouth and showed only one eye, the other was hidden under his ninja head plate. He had silver hair that shot up and a dazed look in his eye. "What do you think Iruka?" Mr. One eye asked the other man holding Kyuubi down. This one had a strait line going over his nose and brown hair.

"I agree with kakashi, but if it stops the Kyuubi from trying to escape, it might be a good idea. Naruto will have to agree with this though!" Kyuubi didn't really know what was going on and nor did he care. All he wanted was freedom even if, just alittle.

Chapter End

See, I told you it was stupid, but I'll continue writing the rest out since ive already finished the story and only need to type it out on the computer. I give you a urgent plea to give me comments….just nothing that has you laughing at me because the story sucks.

Till Next Time… 

Ps: What happens next huh? Kyuubi eats Ramen for the first time, will he like it? And how much will he eat to show Choji who has the bigger stomach?


	2. The Ramen Contest

Hello there its chapter 2 up and running. How do you like the story so far? Well its only going to get worse, live with it!

Naruto no own me by -Sniff- Kyuubi Madness 

Chapter 2

The Ramen Challenge

Next, Kyuubi found himself tide to a chair in the Hokage's room. It seems the extremely old geezer was the Hokage. And they were talking in whispers to one another, in a dark corner near a huge window.

"_Hmph, what the hell are they whispering about over there! I wanna know! I hate having to wait."_ Kyuubi thought impatiently.

And then it happened all too fast. The next thing the Kyuubi knew was that naruto had actually agreed to it! And that's when he woke up a month later in the brat's house! Jiraiya was there sitting on a chair starring at the floor.

"Wow I didn't expect this to actually happen!" Kyuubi said out loud.

"Just be happy it did Kyuubi!" Jiraiya snapped and looked up.

"Hey, cool it, lets not get off on a bad start shall we." Kyuubi said coolly with a wide grin.

"All right just dong get smart with me." Jiraiya replied.

"Yeah, yeah…. I'm hungry, were do you eat…what…do you eat?" Kyuubi asked dreading the answer.

"VEGIIIIIS! All ninjas need strength so we eat vegetables!" Jiraiya said excitedly.

"NOOOOOOoooooo! Kyuubi cried. WHY IS LIFE SO CRUEL TO ME?"

"Aw come on, I'm sure you'll like it. Its better then human flesh that is."

"No way! Your so wrong!" Kyuubi said sadly and dropped his head.

Jiraiya pulled out a green pepper out from one of the cupboards in the kitchen. "Here you go." And went to hand it to the Kyuubi.

"NO! keep that thing away from me!" Kyuubi screamed and jumped behind the table and hid behind a chair.

"Fine then." Jiraiya said and took a bite out of it. "How about a carrot?" And pulled out a carrot from the cupboard.

"Carrots kill…." Kyuubi said quietly, holding on to the back of the chair.

"Ookk. Want some fruit?"

"Don't humans eat meat?" He asked hopefully.

"Well, yeah but veggies are better!" Jiraiya said with a smile.

"Whatever kind of meat it is I'll take it! Just no vegetables!" Kyuubi whined. "They sicken me."

"Hmm. Do you like Ramen?" Jiraiya asked

"Do I like what?" Kyuubi asked with a snap. It was probably some sort of veggie again. Jiraiya looked at him in disbelief.

"Ok fallow me." And he walked out the door.

Jiraiya took the fox to a store were two people wearing chef's clothing were cooking something hot.

"So what the hell is this Ramen thing?" Kyuubi asked again.

"One with chicken and another with vegetables please." Jiraiya said to a woman behind the counter. She smiled sweetly and handed Kyuubi and Jiraiya two hot bowls.

Kyuubi sniffed it curiously. "It SMELLS funny." He announced.

"Pipe up and eat it!" Jiraiya said with a mouth full of veggie Ramen. "Its naruto's favorite."

"Oh goodie, then I'm sure I'll like it." Kyuubi said sarcastically and took a small nibble of some of the noodles and chicken.

"Wellll?" Jiraiya asked after watching him eat it and waited for an answer.

"….."

"do you like it?"

"……"

"…um are you ok?"

"MORE!" Kyuubi screamed jumping on to his chair and holding out his bowl, which was already, empty.

"See, I told you you'd like it." Jiraiya said happily and smiled. He could get used to this part of Kyuubi.

"Hehe, I could eat this all day!" Kyuubi announced with a very wide grin.

"No you couldn't." A voice behind him said . "I could though."

Kyuubi turned around to see whom this bastard was and found himself facing an extremely fat boy with brown hair and swirls on his cheeks. "Oh yeah?" Kyuubi egged.

"Yeah I can." Fat monster retorted.

"You should just agree with him you know." Said a really blond and skinny girl. She wore her hair in a ponytail and for some reason Kyuubi had the urge to call her a pig.

"Man, what are you two doing?" Said another boy, who wore his hair in a ponytail to but it stuck all the way up. "Why do I hang out with you guys? What a drag."

"Shut it Shikamaru!" The skinny shouted. "I'm just telling naruto he cant win in a food contest against Choji."

"Ino, you make life so troublesome." Shikamaru said tiredly. And put his hands behind his head.

"KEEP QUIET BRATS!" Kyuubi yelled angry that they were excluding him from the conversation. "I can eat more than fatty any day!"

Choji looked at him evilly. "Oh really?"

"Yeah!"

"Fine then, its decided. Here and now, food battle, you and me!"

Jiraiya looked at them and put his hand on his face. "First day out and he's already got to start a fight." And he let out a sigh.

"How troublesome, you two can bloat yourselves for all I care, but I'm going to sit and watch the clouds so don't bother me." Shikamaru said lazily and sat on the dirty ground, looked up, and started watching the clouds.

"Ok then!" Ino said putting her hands together and smiled a evil smile. "Here's how the contest goes!"

Chapter end 

Yeah I know it was I bit short, but hey, look at my other fanfics, this is fifty pages long compared to them! Any way please leave a comment and tell me what you think. I LIKE REVIEWS!

Till Next Time… 

Ps: What happens next? Who will win, when it comes to food? Choji and Kyuubi, all out war.


	3. The Obvious Winner

Ok here's the third chapter, please review and tell me what you think…just not in a nasty way.

OMG! I just talked to naruto…. and he said I didn't own him, I was so sad.

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 3

The Obvious Winner

"The contest is simple." Ino said. "Eat until the other….or you drops sick." She looked at Kyuubi with an evil smirk on her skinny bony face. "There will be three categories/stages of Ramen you will have to go through."

"_Uh oh."_ Kyuubi thought and gulped.

"Number one." Ino went on. "Meats, number two, unknown, it will be a surprise, and number three, veggies!"

"HEY! I thought you said the contest was simple?" Kyuubi whined, and gave a pout. "Veggies are just NOT my thing." He mumbled.

"You can always give up." Ino said cruelly.

"Humph. In your dreams." He said and sat down.

Choji picked up his chopsticks and tore them apart. "Let's get this over with." He said hungrily licking his lips.

"Ok Choji, KICK HIS SORRY ASS!" Ino roared and put her fist high in the air to cheer him on. "On my mark, ready, set, GO!"

The race was on, they first had to eat beef and chicken Ramen, that the two people behind the counter were working a sweat to make.

"Ok! In the lead, Choji! Who's eaten ten bowls already!" Ino said proudly.

"No actually." Jiraiya said lazily and pointed to Kyuubi. "You have to watch both of them if you want to commentary this contest. "narutos" already on the second round." Ino took her gaze off of Choji and true enough he was eating the surprise section and wincing every time he ate a vegetable.

"WHAT THE HELL? EAT FASTER CHOJI!" Ino screamed and slapped him on the back making him choke on his chopsticks.

"_Heh, no mach for my stomach."_ Kyuubi thought happily. _"Ew I think I just swallowed a tomato."_

"Ok." Ino said anxiously. "Chojis eaten 15 bowls so far…and is on his second round. And, naruto, well, he's on the last bowl of the fifth time over! HOW DOES HE DO THAT?" Ino exclaimed as Kyuubi was shoveling four bowls of Ramen in at once. Jiraiya yawned and started counting all the pretty girls he saw pass by and noticed kakashi walking with his head in a book, which Jiraiya had in fact written.

"Hey Kakashi." He called while waving for him to come over. Kakashi noticed Choji and "naruto" eating so fast you couldn't see there mouths move.

"Err…how are things?" He asked with a "what the heck" look on his not so visible face.

"Food fight." Jiraiya said. "And not the way you might think."

"Interesting." He said slowly, while watching empty bowls pile up before his eye ever few seconds.

"YEAH! Wait, NO! YES! NO! YEAH, NO, YEAH! Actually NO!" Ino was screaming trying to decide who was in the lead now. "SHIKAMARU ALITTLE HELP?"

"Aww. Can't I just watch the clouds." He snapped out of his daze and looked at her like she was telling him to change fifty dirty baby diapers.

"Who do you think is going to win Shikamaru?" She yelled, trying to be heard over all the munching and covering her head every once in a while because of spraying noodles, until there was a huge bang behind her and when she turned around to look she saw Choji collapse on the ground looking very green in the face.

"I think, naruto." Shikamaru said lazily and went back to sitting on the ground and watching the clouds.

"Hehe, I won." Kyuubi said rubbing it in, and took a piece of beef from his Ramen and waved it in choji's face. One look at it, and Choji got up and started running as fast as his fat legs could carry him to the nearest bathroom. While a giggling "naruto" watch from behind her, Ino stood there dumb struck and saw Choji, not so make it to his destination.

Chapter End 

Hehe I loved the ending didn't you ? Do you think I'm any good at this? To be honest, I'm really embarrass about showing anyone this. So please give me reviews and tell me what I should do now.

Till Next Time..

Ps: What happens next, Kyuubi and Jiraiya go to a festival were they meet a certain sound ninja, lets just say its love at first sight, one way only….


	4. Dosu

So yeah here's the fourth chapter, just a warning, from this chapter on it might get a bit…. Odd, yet In my own Sence, I don't know about yours, funny. PLEASE REVIEW! And thank you to the first two people who have reviewed to this story I never thought I would get a review.

I shall never own a shape or form of naruto not even his soul TT!

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 4

Dosu

About an hour after the "Choji" incident, Jiraiya found himself getting Kyuubi out of all kinds of trouble, like picking a fight with a bunch of kids, stealing, and Kyuubi didn't understand why he couldn't go into peoples houses when he wanted too.

"Hey this is stupid were are people sapost to have fun around here?"

"How about we go watch young women?" Jiraiya asked happily.

"Ew no." Kyuubi replied and put his hands behind his head, as they were walking through a bunch of houses in a line. It seemed pretty empty, actually, it was empty. A tumbleweed bounce happily across their path as they stood there in the empty area.

"What happened here? Reminds me of the village's ive destroyed." Kyuubi announced.

"Hmm. everyone must be at the veggie festival." Jiraiya thought out loud and scratched his head.

"Ahhh! What is it with you ninjas and veggies?"

"Well, you know, in some countries people have to eat veggies just to stay alive to make the veggies! I wasn't lying when I said ninjas were all about fruits and vegetables." Jiraiya retorted.

"Disgusting." Kyuubi moaned as they kept walking down the deserted path of empty houses.

"You know there's a rhyme about beans!" Jiraiya said happily and started to sing. "Beans, beans the magical fruit, the more you eat, the more you to-"

"OK, OK! I get the point." Kyuubi interrupted. "Beans are "magical"."

"Darn right they are!" Jiraiya said and stopped walking and Kyuubi followed. They had stopped on top of a small hill looking downwards toward a whole bunch of shops and inns. There were thousands of people all bunched up together to get to the shops, there were people from other villages too, like the sand, the hidden mist, sound, waterfall, even the star village was there, and more!

"Awww." Jiraiya cooed. "Look at all the cute girls!"

"Yeah, great. Can we go eat now, I'm starving." Kyuubi said and rubbed his stomach.

"B-but didn't you just eat, like, gojuu(fifty) bowls of Ramen?" Jiraiya stuttered in amazement.

"Iie baka." Kyuubi announced putting his hands on his hips and raising his index finger. "Two hundred and fifty bowls of Ramen!" He corrected.

Jiraiya only could look at him blankly.

As they were walking down the crowded street, their lives changed forever, mainly Kyuubi's. they ran into a sound ninja, Dosu, who had bandages all over his head except for one eye. He had really long sleeves that covered his hands but one of his hands had a huge metal thing with holes on it. So anyway they ran into Dosu, literally.

BANG!

"AHHH! WATCH IT!" Kyuubi roared angrily. While trying to get up. "OR I'LL MAKE YOU WISH YOU WERE NEVER BORN!"

"Hmph! THAT'S MY LINE YOU…you…." Dosu looked at Kyuubi and smiled. "You have lova-lily eyes you know that?"

"OH YEAH, well you…what?"

Chapter end

So yeah, that's how they meet . Anyway, do you like it so far? I hope its funny. And please review, because I would really like to know what you think? Just as another warning, it will get alittle strange after this one , so live with it!

Till Next Time 

Ps: what happens next… its basically a whole chapter of Kyuubi trying to get away from a very love struck Dosu.


	5. GET AWAY FROM ME

Hello there again! This is a short chapter but, I think its one of the funniest ones, when I wrote it I must have been high on sugar! Or I was just giddy because it was late at night…. Anyway, hope you enjoy, I WaNt REVIEWS DAMN IT!

Dear naruto, I know I don't own you and it brings a tear to my eye to say it, but I never will! -Starts bawling-

Kyuubi madness 

Chapter 5

GET AWAY FROM ME

They sat there starring at each other, in the middle of a street full of people for at least five minutes, until Dosu decided to jump on Kyuubi.

"ACK! WHAT ARE YOU DO- GET OFF!" Kyuubi screamed while trying to pry off Dosu. Who had a grip of steal.

"Oh your so cute!" Dosu cried happily and clung to him tighter.

Jiraiya looked at Kyuubi and then to the sound ninja. "Looks like you've made a friend already Kyuubi." He said smiling.

"SHUT UP! I DON'T MAKE FRIENDS!" Kyuubi roared angrily.

"Oh really?" Jiraiya asked, alittle hurt.

"Yeah! Do you have a PROBLEM with that!" The nine tails asked very frustrated at a clinging sound ninja.

Dosu, still clinging to Kyuubi, faced him, till they were nose to nose and whispered. "I like the feisty ones." And grinned from ear to ear.

The fox looked like he had been struck over the head with a chicken. "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! HELP! JIRAIYA HELP ME DAMN IT!" He screamed trying desperately to get out of Dosu's killer grasp.

"Ehh? Did I just hear a cry for help?" He asked cruelly and put his hand to his hear. "Sounded quite pitiful really."

"P-please Jiraiya!" Kyuubi said through gritted teeth.

"Well I don't know, who ever it was would need a "friend" to help, not an old man." Jiraiya said to himself.

"Teehee. I like this old geezer." Dosu said and squeezed Kyuubi who looked like he had been struck over the head with two chickens.

"_Oh yeah. Tough guy hu?"_ He thought desperately_. "Lets see if he can resist this then."_ And as soon as Jiraiya saw Kyuubi's killer puppy eyes, added with a tear, he jumped into action and started pulling the creepy sound ninja away. Unfortunately, Dosu saw the puppy pout too and grasped Kyuubi even harder, making him gasp for air.

"HAARRUUAAAA!" Jiraiya roared like a battle cry and pealed Dosu off of a flattened Kyuubi. As soon as Kyuubi was free he tackled Jiraiya into a near by tree. "YOW! What was that for? I just saved your sorry ass!" Jiraiya asked angrily and got up.

"That was for making me ask for help! And this." He kicked him in the shin. "Was for taking that tone with me!" He replied angrily and punched him hard enough to send him flying back into the tree.

"OW! Now what was that for?" Jiraiya yelled. Rubbing his back that was full of splinters.

"Oh that?" Kyuubi asked lazily. "That's because I felted like it." And started walking casually toward town, but on the look out for Dosu.

"Hmph." Jiraiya snorted. "He sounded like my mother." He said to himself.

"I heard that!" Kyuubi yelled back with his hands behind his head.

Jiraiya sighed.

"_I think this is the beginning of a very odd story."_ And started following him back into town.

Chapter End 

…? Yes I know, very odd. And it was short but oh well, the chapters will get longer. So yeah, lets just say if you don't give me reviews I shall die because its my life-saport.

Till Next Time 

Ps: what happens next… it's the next month now and Kyuubi finds himself lost in a night club were he learns that human woman can be very, very scary.


	6. Night Time Detour

I warn you, this is a very, VERY odd chapter! Just so you know, this chapter is kind of like a special…

Plots mine but show is a no, no…

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 6

Night Time Detour

Kyuubi woke up a month later and Jiraiya took him to his new favorite place, which he called the food store… there he would eat all he wanted and make Jiraiya suffer because he had to buy the stuff he was chowing down on. Every so often Kyuubi would spot Dosu off in the distance and hide behind anything that was possible to hide behind. Jiraiya once found him in a garbage can because Dosu walked by looking for him. Finally Jiraiya was able to choose were they would go next. It was 10:00 pm and he wanted to go to a nightclub that was only in Konoha that night, you can only guess why he wanted to go there.

"Ugh, tell me again why you want to go in that loud place." Kyuubi said to Jiraiya sounding annoyed. They were standing right outside the nightclub that was full of loud music that hurt kyuubi's ears.

"Ooooo! Teehe! Look at them!" Jiraiya said to himself giddily and obviously not listening to Kyuubi.

"OI! Did you hear me?" Kyuubi barked and started tapping his foot with his arms crossed.

"Come on let's go inside." Jiraiya said and motioned for him to fallow. On the inside it was totally dark and crowded, full of slutty drunk woman and men dancing about (Ew! I mean really! O.O). The only light was from the Glow In The Dark paint that was splattered all over the walls and ground. There was a long food table at one end of the room and on the other end was the DJ who was just as slutty as the rest of the people. The music was kinda good though. There were little groups of woman and men in odd ends of the large dark room.

As soon Kyuubi spotted the food table he was there and eating all the strange food on the table. When he looked back Jiraiya was gone. "Yo, old man!" Kyuubi called out with a mouth full of food but he couldn't even hear his own voice! The music was so loud that Jiraiya couldn't possibly hear him. "What a bother, that old idiot brings me here and then just leaves me to fend for myself in this…." Kyuubi looked around. "This hell hole!"

"Hey there little boy -hic- ." a voice said to his right. "Watcha doin in a place like dis -hic-." The young woman asked and started drinking out of a large bottle. She had red hair and lots of tattoos.

"What do you want? Beat it!" Kyuubi replied coldly. And continued to eat what was on the table.

"Aw don't be so -hic- mean!" Another woman said to his left holding the same kind of large bottle in her hand. This one had piercing all over her body let alone tattoos. Kyuubi couldn't even tell what color her hair was.

"I'm telling you, get lost!" He said again and took a bite of some funny tasting cake.

"What's ya doing kid?" Another woman said from behind. By this time Kyuubi was getting alittle nervous. They smelt funny, it prickled his nose and in an odd sense he kinda liked it (Omg not you too Kyuubi! T.T).

"Er… what are you drinking?" He asked curious and turned around to face a really, really skinny woman in bearly anything and extremely big- ( OK, OK WE GET THE PICTURE! O.O).

"Oh you wanna try's some -hic-." She replied and handed him the bottle. He sniffed it and was about to take a sip when the red head jumped on him. Then the other two followed.

"AAAAHHHH!" Kyuubi screamed as he was crushed under all three women. Humans weren't suppost to act this way, he knew that much. They were hiccuping left and right and staggering this way and that.

"Aw. Your so, your so, sexy." Skinny woman said in his ear. Kyuubi nearly fainted. This village was mest!

He didn't care anymore, he had to get these freaks off of him! "AAAAHHHH!" He screamed and threw all of them off at once and started running through the crowed room in search of Jiraiya.

"Hey -hic- comes back yous!' Odd hair called to him as they lay toppled on one another. Then she passed out, out cold. The other two followed shortly.

"Oohh. What the heck was in that food?" He moaned as he ran through the groups of flirting women and men, or more like, staggered through. _"I feel so…happy."_ He thought to himself and giggled for no apparent reason. He really wondered what that drink tasted like now. He began to squeeze through a large gang of teenagers and when he popped out he found Jiraiya laughing with a bunch of women in his arms. But everything was getting blurry now and he couldn't really count how many women were there. It looked like maybe six… or was it sixteen? _"Ugh more of those?" _Kyuubi thought to himself and staggered back wards.

"Oh there you are!" Jiraiya said and laughed as one of the women said something to him quietly. "Are you having a good time?"

"Eh?" Kyuubi answered. And wobbled around till he fell down. "Why are you pink old man?" He asked as he stared at a rapidly changing color Jiraiya.

"Oh am I?" He asked and look down at his hands. "No I don't look pink to me? Are you feeling ok Kyuubi? Where were you exactly?"

"Um, under a bunch of scary human girls. They're scary you know. Did I mention scary?' He said matter oh factly. And looked up at him from on the ground. "Hey now your green!" He said then pointed and giggled.

"Uh oh. Did you eat anything?" Jiraiya asked as he saw Kyuubi swaying from side to side singing to himself and laughing. "You know everything here is pact to the rim with the strongest alcohol so I hope you didn't touch any food or drink." He told Kyuubi who wasn't listening instead he was counting his fingers.

"Ninety two thumbs, ninety four thumbs. Teehee."

"_Oh boy. Narutos going to have a hangover tomorrow…"_

Chapter end.

Do you like it? Hehe, poor Kyuubi….actually, poor naruto. He's the one whose gonna have the hang over and lose lots of brain cells making him even more thick then he already is in the morning -sniff-. so anyway please review before I grow of old age.

Till Next Time

Ps: What happens next you may wonder? Well things start to rap up as the story ends but what's this? Was Kyuubi ever human? Then why does a human girl friend of his appear in the village? Or should I call her more demon then human O.O…


	7. Tora The Tiger

I know, I must put in a dreaded, dare I say it, original character! OO NOOOOooooo, IVE DEFILED MY STORY! I really don't want to but it's got to be done, because I don't think Kyuubi really knows a human girl in the show.

I don't own naruto but I do own Tora.

Kyuubi madness

Chapter 7

Tora The Tiger

Seven months had gone by since Kyuubi first started living through naruto once a month. Dosu would never let him out of his sight, and Jiraiya would usually just watch as Dosu, whenever he laid his eyes on Kyuubi, tackle him to the ground and smother him with hugs. This usually ended with Jiraiya getting hurt some way or another because Kyuubi got mad at him for not helping him or what not. But things seemed to be calm and happy for Kyuubi and the village, to Kyuubi, nothing could go wrong now….or, it seemed that way, but little did Kyuubi know he would meet someone he hadn't seen in years.

"I keep telling you Kyuubi, you don't treat cats that way." Jiraiya went on as they walked back from an alleyway full of cats that Kyuubi had tossed around for kicks (that's never good, cats hold grudges).

"Feh." He replied, obviously not listening. They were walking passed the front gates to out of Konoha when Jiraiya saw a young woman walking in holding two heavy looking bags of luggage. She looked about in her late twenties or early thirties and she wore a long black dress which matched her long black hair.

"Oohhh! Look at that young lady!" Jiraiya said as he watched her come in.

"Yeah look at her." Kyuubi agreed transfixed on watching her come in too.

"Wh-what?" Jiraiya asked with a grin. "I thought you said you didn't care for human woman, and that you were afraid of them."

"Hey! When did is say I was afraid of them! And I'm not fond of them ok!" Kyuubi growled feeling his face getting hot. "She just looks a bit familiar! Do you have a problem with that old man?" He raised his fist. _"What a bastard, always trying to embarrass me!"_ He thought angrily.

"Um squews me sir. The young woman asked Jiraiya sweetly. "I'm looking for an inn, do you know were I can find one?"

"Well hello there, yes certainly." Jiraiya replied in his womanizing voice that Kyuubi heard all the time when he was out. "And what would your name be miss?" He asked while helping her with her luggage which he had to put down instantly because it was too heavy for him (this woman must be strong ¬¬ too strong).

"Oh I'm sorry." She said politely and flicked her long black hair out of her face. "My name is, Tora."

"WHAT?" Kyuubi screeched. "I thought you looked familiar!"

"Sorry do I know you?" Tora asked confused as Kyuubi jumped up and down pointing at her, seemingly trying to remember something.

"YOU! Your that BITCH that I dumped twenty five years ago!" Kyuubi said angrily still pointing rudely at Tora.

"Twenty-five years ago?" She asked even more confused. "I'm sorry, but are you even fifteen yet?"

"Hey it's not the outside that matters, its what lies within that counts." He said and grinned his Kyuubi grin as he laughed at his own joke.

"_Oh this day keeps getting better and better."_ Jiraiya thought to himself and smiled as he watched a very polite and neat looking lady battle a rude loud untidy Kyuubi fox.

"Um." Tora said timidly. "Then what's your name then?" She asked politely.

"Er…. I'm not saying that in front of him." And he cocked his head toward Jiraiya.

"Awww. Don't leave me out of the conversation. I wanna know your "real" name!" Jiraiya whined and pouted.

"Shew, go! SCRAM!" Kyuubi barked and waved his hands for Jiraiya to leave.

"Hmph." Jiraiya grumbled angrily and stood a couple feet away so he couldn't hear what they said. Or could he? He quickly got out a small devise from his pocket and stuck it into his ear to listen.

"So um, who are you anyway?" Tora asked, once again, really politely. Matter oh fact. She was too polite.

"Hmph, do you remember someone who went by Haraku?" Kyuubi asked quietly.

"WHAT? THAT FRIGGEN JERK!" She screamed making Jiraiya rip the devise out of his ear before he went deaf. "Were is he? I don't see him." And she looked around.

"Its me you old dope!" He hissed.

"Hehe." Jiraiya cackled as he walked towards them picking at his ear that was still ringing. "Haraku eh?"

"WHY YOU!" Kyuubi roared and lunged for Jiraiyas neck.

"_Heh. How could that little kid be my Haraku Kun!"_ Tora wondered as Jiraiya and Kyuubi wrestled in the background. _"I just don't get it."_ She said rubbing her chin as Jiraiya headlock Kyuubi but then Kyuubi threw him over his back. _"He left me twenty five years ago, and ive never seen him since. I was fourteen and he was thirteen. Yet this kid looks like he's still twelve."_ She went on as Kyuubi dived at a roaring Jiraiya who smacked his chest like a gorilla. "OK!" Tora bellowed. "LISTEN UP!" Kyuubi and Jiraiya stopped fighting and looked at her, Kyuubi had his hand around Jiraiya's neck and Jiraiya was just about to use the Rasengan on kyuubi's chest. "TELL ME WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!" She screeched. Now any form of politeness gone from her voice, she was like a tiger ready to kill if necessary. "Or else." She added evilly cracking her knuckles. Jiraiya and Kyuubi swallowed as she loomed over them with fire prancing around her.

Chapter End 

"Ok there goes another chapter." I said cheerfully clapping my hands together. You look at me like I'm crazy. "Oh dear, am I still in fanfiction mode." I whispered to myself and sweat dropped. "Ive been writing so many lately, guess I'm stuck this way now." And I smile. "Well anyway, give me reviews and tell me what you think." I said and starts to dance off, leaving you still standing there looking like you'd just seen a herd of Jiraiyas go by singing beans, beans the magical fruit.

Till Next Time 

Ps: wanna know what's going to happen next? Keep checking in to see how the story ends! (Hehe I'm so cruel.)


	8. Dosu And Tora, Deadly Encounter

Heya, second to last chapter peoples, and I -sniff- have only gotten 3 or 4 reviews, -sniff- oh -wipes tear from eye- why don't people review!

Naruto doesn't belong to me, and Tora does, along with this plot, but I don't think anyone's going to steal it any time soon.

Kyuubi Madness 

Chapter 8

Dosu And Tora, Deadly Encounter

"Tora, temper check!" Kyuubi hollered as she pounded down punches at he and Jiraiya.

"What the heck happened to that polite young lady!" Jiraiya screeched as Tora hit Jiraiya's face in.

"TELL ME WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON? I WANT TO KNOW AND I WANT TO HEAR IT NOW!" She roared as she threw her monster punches.

"Listen you! I'm Haraku got it? You're old boyfriend!" Kyuubi bellowed as he jumped out of her deathblows. "Come on Tora, don't you remember the person who dumped you twenty five years ago?" He asked and then gave the killer puppy eyes while he put his hands on his hips.

"Omg, you really are him." She finally agreed after seeing this act only Kyuubi could do. She stopped pounding a sobbing bruised Jiraiya at her knees. "But you don't look like him at all! Haraku was taller, older and had reddish brown hair not blond, the only thing you two have in common is your eyes." Tora said and looked into his small crimson eyes.

"Well, er….you see, I kinda got into a bit of trouble, and ended up….er, in a complicated position." Kyuubi stumbled and started fidgeting his fingers.

"Hmm? What did you do?" Tora replied and gave him an evil look. "You didn't hurt anyone did you!" And she cracked her knuckles.

Kyuubi looked down and coughed while shifting uncomfortably were he stood.

"Well I guess you were always the violent one." Tora said matter oh factly and smiled, then stepped into memory lane.

"WHAT? ME? THE VIOLENT ONE! ARE YOU JOKING?" Kyuubi snapped. "You're the one who always hit me and hurt anyone who touched anything of yours! The reason why I left you was because you were a control freak!"

"WHAT?…..Well, only alittle." She blushed and smiled innocently. "I didn't want you to leave me you know! And you still haven't explained why you look like a twelve-year-old!"

"Ok, am I missing something here?" Jiraiya piped up. "The last time I checked, Kyuubi hated humans and killed every time he laid his eyes on one …but, supposedly he's dated a human before!" He asked confused.

"Kyuubi?" Tora asked excitedly with an eviler grin than kyuubi's could get. "He was human the last time dated him! Why do you say Kyuubi? The cute demon fox?"

"Er….Jiraiya could you keep your blasted mouth shut." Kyuubi said uncomfortably.

"Ooooh. So she never knew you were the legendary nine tails fox demon?" Jiraiya asked loudly and smiled gleefully. Kyuubi smacked his hand to his face and shook his head.

"Oh really?" Tora asked happily. "Tell me more." She demanded and clapped her hands together.

"Well your "Haraku" is the Kyuubi and is sealed inside this kid as punishment for destroying our village years ago." Jiraiya replied with a smirk as he watched Kyuubi looking for a good place to hide because Tora was eyeing him evilly with a big grin on her face.

"Oh he's mine alright." She said happily.

"I don't know how he passed himself off as a human though, and dated you, but you know, that would make a very nice book….and I think it would sell for high. Hmm." Jiraiya wondered and giggled as he thought up a new story for his icha, icha paradise.

"I can switch my form you know! I'm not weak!" Kyuubi mumbled angrily.

"EEEE! That means I have a pet, AND, a boyfriend!" Tora squealed happily and dive at Kyuubi as he started to bolt down an alleyway.

"HEY WERE NOT TOGETHER ANYMORE, and I am most certainly not a pet!" Kyuubi growled as he found himself facing a dead end, and when he thought he could jump up onto the roofs he spotted a bunch of angry ally cats he had tossed around before, if he so much as went near them, they would have their revenge with full force (that's why you don't bug the kitties! ). He twirled around quickly to get out of the alleyway, but lightning flashed and an outline of Tora stood at the end, arms outstretched ready to grab him if he should run.

"MWAHAHAHA!" She cackled. "You're my pet now." And she dived at a small trembling heap on the ground.

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Dosu had decided to get some nice flowers for Kyuubi since he came out today. He was in a nearby field picking crimson red flowers when he heard a loud scream come from an ally way near by. Dosu knew that scream anywhere. It was the sound of a Kyuubi being hugged against its will. Dosu knew this because he would hug him all the time and Kyuubi would make that noise. (And we all know he's all about sound since he's a sound ninja ). So he went to check it out.

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"AAAHHH!" Kyuubi screamed, trying to shove off a giggling Tora. But she held on tighter then Dosu (wow, that's impossible!). _"This is why I started killing humans, there pests!" _Kyuubi thought as he desperately tried to get away, and as always, Jiraiya just watched with a smile on his face and his arms crossed as he leaned against the side of the alleyway. He seemed to like watching Kyuubi struggle.

"Oh I'm so happy I have a pet fox!" Tora said excitedly and smothered Kyuubi tightly, Kyuubi moaned.

"_Wait till I tell naruto about this!"_ Jiraiya thought to himself and chuckled. Just then a flash of cow print fabric flashed by Jiraiya, blowing his white hair to the side.

"RAAAAR!" Dosu battle cried and flew himself into Tora, then started strangling her. Kyuubi had never been so happy to see that annoying bundle of hell.

"DOSU! SAVE ME!" He cried and jumped out of Tora's arms, then ran behind him for protection.

"What are you doing to MY boyfriend?" She strained the my a lot.

"I'm only aloud to hug him!" Dosu pouted angrily as Kyuubi peeked around his leg and stuck his toung out at her.

"Yeah! Well no, actually!" Kyuubi corrected. "Nobody's supposed to even touch me, but they do anyway." He grumbled.

"HES MINE!" Tora roared and grabbed the unsuspecting fox's arm.

"NO, HES MINE!" Dosu screamed and grabbed his other arm.

"_Oh god no."_ Kyuubi pleaded, and cringed as they both started to tug. A crowed was now starting to form and watch, and Jiraiya took this opportunity to set up a stand for tickets. $2.00 only! He shouted out to the crowd as kyuubi's arms popped in the background.

Chapter End 

Hehehe. Next chapter is the last chapter so stay tuned to see how this wild story ends. NO MORE PLEASES I WANT REVIEWS SO GIVE EM TO ME!

Till Next Time 

Ps: what happens next? Tora and Dosu battle to see who deserves Kyuubi, I wonder who will win, and what will Kyuubi do?


	9. The Final Battle That Determines All

Here's the last chapter peoples. I hope you've enjoyed, because ive enjoyed writing it! And someone gave me a good idea, so I might just write a sequel after this. Do you want me to as well, because that means I can get possibly more reviews -cough- I want reviews -cough-.

I own Tora, nothing else, not a fragment of Kyuubi, not even a smidgen of Jiraiya or a piece of naruto, I do own this plot and what I make them do though. Yay me!

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 9

The Final Battle That Determines All

"So you want to play it that way huh?" Tora asked evilly, at this point in time, no one would have ever guessed that she had a nice polite side to her. She tugged harder on kyuubi's arm she had a grip on. Kyuubi flinched in agony.

"_Does she even remember what she's fighting for anyway!" _He thought desperately.

"Yeah, I'll show you, you won't even be able to touch me! I'm from the magnificent sound village!" Dosu roared proudly at Tora and tugged harder on Kyuubi's other arm.

"_Please make it stop!" _Kyuubi pleaded and looked up at the sky between the two walls of the ally way and a tear fell from his eye.

"Hmph, more like the magnificent PON village!" Tora shot back. "Sound ninjas are only orochimaru's pons, people he can use as bait or in sacrifices, nothing more!"

"What are you talking about weirdo!" Dosu asked angrily. "Pons are for chess baka!"

"Man, you're the baka!" _"This kids retarded."_ Tora said to herself. "FINE! If it's a battle you want, then it's a battle you shall get!" And she let go of kyuubi's arm, making it snap back into its socket so hard it threw him towards Dosu. Unfortunately, Dosu did the same and Kyuubi hit the ground hard.

"Ooohhh, my arms…." Kyuubi moaned. "Why-is-life-so- CRUEL TO ME?" He asked the heavens while rubbing his arms. It seemed to be his catch line.

"Oh goodie, there's a fight now people!" Jiraiya said cheerfully as he commentaried what went on to the crowd. "That's an extra dollar to the tickets!" And he started to hand out green pieces of paper, then turned back to the ally way to start commentarying it. "So the battle is on!" He started. "Tora take the first move! Oh what's this? She's using……wait, what the heck IS she using.?" Jiraiya asked as he and the crowd watched curiously. She was just standing there forming chakura all around her body.

"_Oh no, not this move." _Kyuubi thought as he remembered what she was capable of.

"Feh, what ever you're doing, it won't work!" Dosu said cockily and flicked his huge metal arm sending sound towards Tora, who was still unmoving and forming chakura.

"_Damn it, human women are so scary."_ Kyuubi thought to himself as he watched the fight while nursing his arms.

The sound Dosu had sent to Tora didn't even seem to effect her, well sort of, but when she fell to the ground in a millisecond she was back on her feat again, still forming chakura.

"Well then, I'll try something different!" Dosu said angrily, although he was just as weirded out as everyone else at what he just saw, or to be precise, didn't see. He ran at her with full force and took a swing but when it reached her, she was beside him, like she hadn't even moved. "What the devil!" Dosu said alittle panicky now. He threw another punch at her but again, like before, it missed her by a mile.

"Ha! It's useless!" She said to him and smiled, but it was like she told him an hour ago, because the noon sun was now set and the moon was out. "You see." Tora told him. "I use time!" She cackled and in less then a second she had hit him to the ground.

"T-TIME!" Dosu asked, now totally freaked out, just like everyone else.

"Yes!" Tora hissed with a smirk. "I come from the village hidden in time. There's nothing you can do that I can not change in time."

"How is that possible though, there's no such thing!" Dosu cried out as she hit him again, but it was like she didn't even move. She was still forming her chakura and with her eyes closed. "No way! I can't let that girl beat me!" Dosu thought. "Kyuubi is at stake here! With his beautiful eyes and everything!"

"MUAHAHAHAHAHA!" Tora cackled. "Kyuubi shall forever be with me! And then I can hug him and love him till the very day I die!" All this and she didn't even move when she said it, all she did was continue to focus her chakura, she didn't even move her mouth, which scared everyone even more. "Hehe, and then I'm taking him with me when I go too, hehehehe." She added, and saw Kyuubi shiver then role his eyes.

"-cough- control freak -cough-" he said again.

"_The day is almost over and Kyuubi will go back into the seal if this battle doesn't end soon."_ Jiraiya thought as he saw the moon suddenly appear in the sky were the midday sun had just been. _"I wonder what will happen."_ And he watched Dosu get beat up over and over by a girl who didn't even move.

"Ok, here I go!" Dosu said to himself as he put his plan to action. Just as she went for another hit in her space and time act, Dosu grabbed her hand. With a flash of white light Dosu found himself standing on an invisible platform in space! Standing there was Tora.

'Hmm, you're pretty good!" She said and smiled sweetly at him. "What's your secret?"

"Well, you hit me in a pattern that I followed and grabbed you at the exact moment you hit me. Oh, and I thought of Kyuubi and his lovalily eyes." Dosu replied and grinned. Tora thought over his plan and how it had worked over for a minute and then gave him the thumbs up.

"Ok, I guess, just for you, I will acknowledge you as some one who can hug my darling boyfriend slash fox pet." Tora said and gave a tigery grin.

"Yeah, I guess you can too, I guess you can hug him…but you only, since your such a powerful opponent." Dosu said nodded. And then with another flash they were back in real time again and the day was back to noon with the sun high in the sky, like no time had passed since they both had been gone. Everyone was staring at them now with frightened expressions on their faces.

"BOO!" Tora roared and did a fake lunge for the audience and they all screamed and ran away leaving Jiraiya standing there with a shocked look on his face.

"THAT WAS WICKED!" Jiraiya shouted and started clapping his hands while jumping up and down like an exited little kid with a big smile on his face. Kyuubi on the other hand started to crawl towards the open exit of the ally way, a cat jumped from the sky and landed in front of him, then hissed along with other cats that now blocked his way out. (He really shouldn't have hurt thoughs kitties, IT'S THE RATH OF THE PUSSY CATS AS WE KNOW IT!).

"Hehe, shall we share him?" Tora suggested to her new friend Dosu.

"Yes lets!" Dosu replied and they both grinned at one another with evil intentions in mind for Kyuubi. They both sprang towards a sprinting Kyuubi, and as the sun started to set, Jiraiya heard the cry of a once powerful, legendary, nine tailed demon fox, get pounced by two very, innocent humans.

The End 

By Brooke M (Kyuubi Madness)

So that's the end, did you like it…? You better give me a damn review after you read this, or else, ahem, "pretty please". Anyway, please read my other fanfics, and review to them too!

There May Never Be, A Next Time.


	10. Kyuubi’s Sandy Sequel Part One

Hey there peoples, your favorite nine-tailed fox demon is back and he's got a new friend, Shukaku! This is my two-part sequel! Enjoy!

I don't own Naruto, Nor does he own me.

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 10

Kyuubi's Sandy Sequel Part One

It was another peaceful day in Konoha, the birds were singing, the wind was blowing, and the Kyuubi was howling, wait, the Kyuubi was howling?

"JIRAIYA!" Kyuubi screamed as Tora chased him down the street and Dosu nipping at his heals.

"Aw slow down Kyuubi-kins!" Tora said playfully as she grabbed at Kyuubi, who dodged her every move desperately.

"HELL NO!" He shot back and ran faster. Jiraiya sniggered while sitting in Ichiraku's as he watched Dosu tackle him to the ground with hugs, while Tora smothered him in wet kisses.

"Ahhh, life just doesn't get any better then this, well unless your in a night club that is." Jiraiya sighed happily while drifting off into a girl filled daydream. He was soon snapped out of it when Gaara, Temari and Kankuro sat beside him. The sand siblings had been staying in Konoha for a week now. They had come to visit Naruto, Shikamaru, Sakura, Shino, Kiba and the others. They were to leave tomorrow morning. Jiraiya had explained to the sand siblings that Kyuubi was let out once a month through Naruto and that today was the day it happened, though they still wore shocked expressions at all the commotion.

"Wow, you weren't kidding when you said they loved Kyuubi." Kankuro said as he watched Dosu whisper something into Kyuubi's ear and soon after Kyuubi screamed while Tora laughed evilly as he tried to get away.

"Oh yeah, its always like this. For eight months now Kyuubi's been let out. They always do this to him, its so sad, yet quite entertaining." Jiraiya said and finished eating some Ramen he had ordered.

Gaara sighed. Man was he tired. More tired then usual. How he wished he could just curl up and fall asleep. Shukaku was always nagging at him to let him out, but Gaara just ignored him. Ignored him up till now though.

"**_Ok, how about we make a deal."_** Shukaku said to him, another attempt to have a bit of outside fun. Gaara was ready to ignore him again until Shukaku made this proposal. **_"What if I don't kill or harm anybody in anyway, I just use your form to see the outside world, and you can have a good night's sleep? Sound good?"_** he asked hopefully. Gaara's ears perked at this one.

"_Yeah that does sound good Shukaku, except the fact that I cant trust you."_ He replied inside his head and sighed again. Man was he drowsy, even watching Kyuubi struggle wasn't doing anything for him. Just so, tired…Ooohhh.

"**_Aw, ok then how about I give you full rights to wake up if you see me doing anything bad? Is that even better?" _**he pleaded and waited for Gaara to answer.

He sighed. _"Yeah that sounds good too Shukaku, but how do I know you wont change that some how when I agree?"_ Gaara asked lazily, his head resting on his hand and he was starring off into space.

"**_Goodness, put some trust in me you little worm! I'm not as bad as you think! Give me a chance once in a while! Hmph." _**Shukaku whined and mushroom huffed. Gaara could just imagine him folding his arms and pouting.

"_fiiiine." _Gaara said finally giving in. Oh how good it would feel to just fall asleep with no worries, that's all he cared about right now, that's all he could think of.

"**_YIIIPPEEEEE! Oh you're the best little worm ive ever met! Thank you thank you thank you! YAAAAYYY!" _**Shukaku yipped happily.

Gaara felt happy too, knowing he wouldn't look like he was wearing Temari's eyeliner for alittle while after he slept. "I'll be right back." He said to Temari then he got up and started walking to the nearest alleyway. He stood beside a garbage can, he stepped on something furry and it hissed making him jump. A cat ran out from under his feat and zipped out of the ally way, followed by thousands of others before Gaara's eyes. "Ok that was weird." He said. He then closed his eyes and drifted off.

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Kankuro and Temari sat next to Kyuubi who was currently being force-fed veggie Ramen by Tora.

"Hehe, yesh, yesh. Eat up my widdle Kyuubi-kins." She said and stuffed Ramen into the struggling fox's mouth. Dosu was holding him down so there wasn't much he could do.

"Gaaras been gone a while. I'm going to go find him." Temari said and got up. "you coming Kankuro?" she asked.

"Eh?" He replied, his eyes transfixed on what Dosu and Tora were doing to the legendary fox demon.

"Never mind." Temari said and started to walk off, a sweat drop on the back of her head. She found Gaara in an ally way that reeked of cat odor she was surprised that he would go in there, it was rancid. But what surprised her even more was what he was doing.

"OH YEAH! AHU, AHU! SHAKE DAT BOODY! YEAH!" he sang as he did a little shaking dance in front of her. "hey there sista!" he said and patted her on the head, alittle too hard that gave her a headache, not to mention the fact that he couldn't sing.

"G-Gaara what the heck are you, um, doing?" she asked, alittle freaked by this sudden change of Gaara's attitude.

"I'm dancin my dear sista, wanna join along, hehe?" he asked with an insanely wide grin on his face. She shook her head, but it seemed she didn't have a choice. He grabbed her hands and started swing her around at top speed.

"AAAHHHH! THIS IS NOT NORMAL!" she shrieked and her hands slipped from Gaara's clutches and she went flying back to Ichiraku's then landed softly on Kankuro. "few, good thing somebody put this cushion here, other wise I'd be in real agony." She said to herself and looked down at the black mush she was sitting on.

"L-lucky you." Came a muffled voice from underneath her and Kankuro pushed her off.

Jiraiya looked up at her. "what happened?" he asked.

Tora and Dosu looked up as well from their constant torture to Kyuubi. "you look shocked?" They both chorused.

"Gaaras gone mad." She said matter o factly.

"What? You mean madder then he already is? THIS I gotta see!" Kankuro said and jumped to his feat, Kyuubi and the others did the same.

When they got to the alleyway, Kyuubi still had nightmares about, they met Gaara who was playing hopscotch in the dirt.

"Hey there friends wanna, hehe, join me?" he asked and grinned.

"Don't agree to join him with anything." Temari warned the crew. "It'll be the last thing you do, believe me." She finished and they all shuddered.

Kyuubi on the other hand walked right up to him and they starred at each other, nose to nose. After a while Kyuubi spoke. "Hello Shukaku." He greeted and smacked him on the back. "Nice to see yeah again." And he grinned.

Kankuro fainted on the spot and Temari stood there mouth agape.

Chapter End 

Hehe, hello again! Do you like my sequel? It has two parts to it so your going to have to wait for the last bit . Please leave reviews!

There Surprisingly Is A Next Time…


	11. Kyuubi's Sandy Sequel Part Two

Hello. Here is the last and final chapter! It's the longest chapter ive ever made! The name of this chapter is Kiss Me, Kill Me , I got that title from a song I listen too, although the song has nothing related to this story (except the name XD). I know I am terrible with sequels and I might just get rid of this ending because I know it really, really sucks. I don't think I can really do much else with this story, so I don't know if you'll like this chapter very much. Sorry.

I don't own Kyuubi, Shukaku, Gaara, Jiraiya, Temari, Kankuro, Naruto, Dosu, Itachi, Kisame, or Earth. But live in fear for if I ever do (and I plan to), it shall be the end for all of you! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 11

Kyuubi's Sandy Sequel Part Two

Kiss Me, Kill Me

They stood there all in shock for a while as Kyuubi and Shukaku caught up on good times they used to have together. Kankuro twitching in shock on the ground and Temari with her mouth wide open and starring at the too demons who were currently patting each others backs and laughing at some sort of inside joke, tears of laughter in their eyes. Jiraiya, Dosu and Tora however were very confused at this sight.

"Uhh, did we miss something here?" Dosu asked Temari, who didn't move an inch from her position. "HEEELLLOOO!" he screamed in her ear and started slapping her over the face with his metal arm. "EARTH TO SAND FREAK!" This comment reached Temari's ears however and within a second Dosu was on the ground, Temari's fan jabbed deep into the top of his head. Tora seemed to enjoy poking at what used to be Dosu with a sharp stick.

Temari sighed and looked at a confused Jiraiya. "you know the raccoon sand demon. Well it's inside of Gaara, and I guess for some reason, Gaara let him out." She told him. _"I wonder what kind of deal they made?" _she thought to herself and turned back to Kyuubi and Shukaku, folding her arms. She gave a small laugh and smiled. _"probably to get some sleep. I guess Gaara must trust Shukaku not to do anything bad enough, so I guess we're ok." _And she sighed again. How long was Gaara planning to sleep exactly?

"yeah and remember the time we ripped that one guy apart!" Shukaku asked Kyuubi and he started to laugh.

"oh yeah! Good times, good times! Hahaha!" Kyuubi replied and put a hand on Shukaku's shoulder to keep from falling to the ground in laughter while holding his cramped side.

Shukaku suddenly became very serious. He was starring ahead at something with a determined look on his face. While Kyuubi was on the ground bursting out in laughter, he walked over to the most beautiful human woman he had ever set eyes on. Tora stepped back a few paces as he shoved his face not even an inch from hers. "hey there missy, and what would your lovely name be?" he asked and grinned.

"Um Tora, pleased to, uhh, meet you Shukaku." She said timidly and looked away blushing.

Just as Shukaku was about to step a bit closer, kyuubi's head immerged between them, separating Tora and Shukaku. "what'cha doin? he asked and grinned happily, yet his grin had a tinge of darkness to it.

Shukaku stepped back quickly. "just saying hi to Tora." He said and looked to the side with his hands behind his back.

"OOOHHHH KYUUBI! YOU CARE ABOUT ME!" Tora squealed and jumped onto kyuubi's back, with her arms around his neck.

"WHAT? WHAT EVER MADE YOU THINK THAT?" He shot back with a look of disgust on his fox like face and threw her off.

"Tehe, why'd you get between me and Shukaku then?" she giggled, swaying from side to side with her index finger in her mouth.

"HUH! Wh-what do you mean? I was just asking what he was doing? DON'T BE STUPID, I HATE YOU!" he said and crossed his arms angrily.

Jiraiya sighed and helped up a sore Dosu off the ground. _"does this mean I have to watch TWO demons now? Aw man one was bad enough!" _he whined to himself and sighed again. "hey Kyuubi, how about you introduce Shukaku to Ramen?" he said, braking up Tora and kyuubi's bickering.

Kyuubi instantly snapped out of it and smiled a wide smile. "YEAH! Yo Shukaku! Get your ass over to Ichiraku's it's the best human food you will ever taste!" he barked happily and ran towards Ichiraku's with Shukaku skipping joyfully at his heals.

When Shukaku ate Ramen for the first time he acted the same way Kyuubi had when he had first tried it. To kyuubi's disgust however, Shukaku's favorite was the vegetable Ramen. Tora sat on the left of Kyuubi and Dosu on his right, on Tora's left however was Shukaku. "Hi their again beautiful little worm. You look magnificent today! What's your secret?" he asked cheerfully and shoveled in some corn from his Ramen.

"well, first of all I'm not a worm, I'm a fierce tiger. And second of all my secret is….thinking about my Kyuubi Kins all the time! That can do quite beautiful things to you." She added happily and rested her head on kyuubi's shoulder, making him flinch.

They sat there for a while, Shukaku eating Ramen, Temari, Kankuro and Jiraiya having a nice little chat and Dosu and Tora lying they're heads on kyuubi's shoulders. Until Jiraiya felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around and found himself facing a fish gilled man, so close to his face he could taste what he had for lunch, which is best left unknown. "WWAAAAAA!" he screamed in surprise and fell of his chair.

Kisame smiled and waved. "hello there friends! Itachi and I have had a change in heart and decided to live in konoha to do good for all mankind! Haven't we Itachi chan?" he said and helped up a soaking, noodily filled Jiraiya off of the ground.

Itachi nodded happily. "we sure have my cute fishy little friend! We've become changed men, out of the goodness in our hearts!" he said then sat down between Tora and Kyuubi, kissed him on the head and ruffled his hair.

"Who the hell are you?" Kyuubi asked coldly and shuffled a bit to the side.

Jiraiya looked blankly at Itachi. Kisame sighed and leaned closer to Jiraiya. "actually, Itachi's conscience was so bad for what he did to his clan, he had a nervous brake down in the middle of a mission and finally decided to come back to accept the consequences." He whispered to him and Jiraiya's jaw dropped in amazement.

Temari and Kankuro, having no idea who they were ordered them both Ramen and greeted them warmly.

Shukaku got up and tapped Tora on the shoulder. She turned around and smiled. "what's up Shukaku?" she asked playfully, just as she did so however, Shukaku landed her a kiss on the lips. Unfortunately Kyuubi saw this, and to Tora, Dosu, and Jiraiya's surprise, lunged at Shukaku angrily.

"EEEEEE! He does care for me! YAY!" Tora screeched happily and jumped up with her arms in the air, stars in her, eyes and Anime tears flowing down her cheeks.

Jiraiya and Dosu followed then did the same. "YAY, HE DOES CARE FOR SOMBODY, YAY!" They both chorused as Kyuubi and Shukaku fought mercilessly with each other. Temari, Kankuro, Kisame and Itachi snapped out of hard conversation and turned to look at the rumble, wide eyed and shocked at what was going on.

Dosu giggled. It was just like last time, except it were Tora and he fighting over Kyuubi in the cat infested ally way. Not Shukaku and Kyuubi fighting for Tora in front of Ichiraku's.

"HEY I THOUGHT YOU HATED HER?" Shukaku roared and planted Kyuubi on the ground with sand.

"FEH! THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN KISS HER!" Kyuubi growled angrily and broke the sand holding him down and punched Shukaku in the face, cracking some of the sand barrier that cased on him.

"WELL I DID, SO LIVE WITH IT FOX!" Shukaku snapped and threw a large sand ball at Kyuubi but he ducked it.

"HA! IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO YOU FAT RACCOON! Kyuubi roared and swung a punch at his head.

"Oh I'm so happy that I have boys fighting over me!" Tora said happily and clapped her hands together.

Kankuro and Temari sat there watching the fight with Kisame and Itachi. _"What have I gotten myself back into?" _Itachi asked himself and held on to Kisame who held onto Itachi as they saw the two demons fighting each other angrily.

Kisame shuddered and gripped Itachi tighter. "Oh Itachi!"

Itachi shivered and gripped Kisame tighter. "Oh Kisame!" he cried and they both started hugging each other in "fright".

Temari and Kankuro were now watching the two ex Akatsuki members shudder in fear and hold each other while sobbing dramatically. Kankuro cocked an eyebrow and Temari got out the popcorn. It was like watching a really good love story and an action movie squished together!

"hold me!" Kisame whispered in Itachi's ear.

"I am." Itachi whispered back and they both sobbed harder. It then started to rain and Kankuro slapped a hand to his head and walk over to the fight with Kyuubi and Shukaku while Temari wiped a tear from her eye and shoveled in some popcorn.

On the other side, Tora, Jiraiya and Dosu were cheering on Kyuubi and Shukaku, just like people do at hockey games. "YEAH! HIT HIM IN DA BAL-" Jiraiya started with his hands high in the air but Tora jabbed him in the side with her elbow.

"don't ruin a nice fight scene idiot!" she retorted and when Jiraiya tried to protest she gave him an evil look which shut him up good. "COME ON, BOTH OF YOU FIGHT FOR ME!" she cheered and started shaking her fist in the air.

"GooooooOOOOO KYUUBI! Kyuubi, Kyuubi he's our fox, HIS CRIMSON EYES ARE PRETTIER THEN ROCKS! YEEEAHHH KYUUBI!" Dosu sang, for a sound ninja he really could not sing. He then started doing cheerleader moves with pom poms in his hands in front of a gathering crowd, every month Kyuubi came out there was something new and the crowd usually got out their cameras ready for that day. "CAN YOU GIVE ME A K!" Dosu cried and struck his metal arm making it sound out a k and the crowd shouted out the k and then the y and then the double u and finally the i.

Kankuro on the other hand was cheering for Shukaku now and doing his own rap move techniques with his puppets dancing behind him. "SAND, SAND HES OUR MAN, IF SHUKAKU CANT DO IT THEN NOBODY CAN!" he sang and one of his puppets started to brake dance behind him.

Both the fighting demons sweat dropped and Shukaku found it in his heart to shut kyuubi's cheerleader up by covering his sand over Dosu's horrible singing mouth, along with Kankuro's constant screaming "sand, sand" in the back ground.

Temari ate the popcorn, she didn't want the movie to end so fast but as Itachi and Kisame finished doing they're ballet under the rain cloud above them she heard Tora scream out both Shukaku and kyuubi's name as both demons collapsed in a tie. Itachi and Kisame then bowed and Temari clapped happily, while in tears because of the wonderful ending.

--------------------------------------------

It was 11:59 PM and Kyuubi was going back into naruto for another month. And Shukaku was going back into Gaara. They all said they're final good byes and Shukaku kissed Tora on the cheek as he and Kyuubi went back into each of they're vessels.

In the morning, as Kankuro and Temari walked out of Konoha to head for Sunagakure, they watched Gaara say good bye to naruto and Shikamaru that were waving sayonara to him at the gates. There was something different about him some how, he acted alittle happier and he looked different too. "wow, yesterday was exciting wasn't it sister?" Kankuro asked and looked over at Temari who looked at him back.

"Yeah" she replied as Gaara ran happily to catch up to them. "Like when did Gaara stop using my eyeliner?"

The End FOR REAL!

There we go, please leave reviews and tell me what you think! Also if you like Full Metal Alchemist please read my Barry The Chopper fanfic, its really weird and in a Sence funny . Review to it I beg you!

There Really Never Will Be A Next Time

DATTEBAYO!


	12. Second Sequel Part One

Omg, I had this awesome idea and I just had to extend the story XD! There are things you should know before I begin this. One, Tsunade is now Hokage, two, Tora doesn't exist and never did, so basically it's only Dosu whose in love with Kyuubi, but he probably won't appear in this chapter or the next, I'm not sure, and last but not least, Itachi and Kisame don't have any roll in this chapter and never have. So yeah, basically those last few chapters of the real Kyuubi madness fic don't count in this chapter. Let's just say this is another special.

I don't own Naruto, but I do own this fic's story plot.

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 12

Second Sequel Part 1

The Dance

Another day with Kyuubi out, and another clear day, there was white fluffy clouds floating high in the sky and the sun scorched everything in sight. Red high-heels stopped in front of wooden sandals. "Good afternoon, Jiraiya." Tsunade greeted. "Good afternoon to you too, Tsunade." Jiraiya replied and waved his hand cheerfully while a sour Kyuubi stood beside him, his arms crossed. 

"I'm bored you old perv, find me something to do before I go completely insane." He growled and started fanning his face with his hand. "And I'm hot, bring me some ice." Kyuubi ordered as he continued to wave hot air into his face. "On the double." He added.

Jiraiya sighed and nodded while Tsunade cocked an eyebrow. "You his slave now?" she asked sarcastically and Jiraiya started rubbing both his eyelids in annoyance.

"apparently."

"Well anyway Jiraiya, what are you doing for the Dance Ball on Thursday?" Tsunade asked and started starring at the ground, her hands behind her back.

Jiraiya snapped open his eyes and grinned. "Yeah! I'm going to bring in some decorations in the morning! I can't wait! Just imagine how many girls will be there, Ooh!" he giggled and slapped his hands together excitedly.

Tsunade shifted in her spot, still looking at the ground. "So, um, do you have anybody to go with?"

"No, but I plan to ask somebody really cute!" Jiraiya replied, now jumping up and down happily.

"YO! Jiraiya! Get me some friggen ice!" Kyuubi demanded and started tugging at Jiraiya's shirt angrily. "I'm hot!"

"Nooo, Naruto's hot." He replied sarcastically then stopped jumping up and down to point at some girls passing by.

Tsunade shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah, I don't have anyone to go with either." She said quietly and glanced up at Jiraiya who patted her on the back.

"Is that so? Don't worry then, you've come to the right guy!"

Tsunade lifted her head smiling. "Really?" she asked excitedly.

Jiraiya nodded and patted her on the back again, grinning happily. "Yep, I'll help you find some old guy to go with, don't worry about it!"

**CRACK! **

Jiraiya jumped in alarm and Kyuubi flinched as the loud sound rang in his ears. Tsunade had crashed her left heal hard down on the pavement below them, smashing it to several jagged pieces.

"EH! Did I say old! I meant an extremely young and good-looking guy!" Jiraiya stated while waving his hands nervously. A vain popped on Tsunade's head and she shook her fist in anger.

Jiraiya couldn't understand why Tsunade was getting all upset, he had "corrected" his statement hadn't he? "How about an extremely young, good-looking guy, AND really smart?"

Kyuubi slapped a hand to his face as Tsunade growled in her throat. _"Guess I better stop this before things get worse."_ He grabbed Jiraiya by his ponytail and pulled him down to eye level. "She wants to go with YOU, you old crackpot!" he spat and tossed Jiraiya towards Tsunade who blushed and backed away.

Jiraiya fell to Tsunade's feet and looked up at her. "Wanna go to the Dance with me?" he asked awkwardly and she nodded then helped him up.

Then Tsunade walked over to Kyuubi, who was still fanning his face with his hand with an annoyed look on his face. "What do _you_ want?" he asked rudely and continued to fan. Jiraiya walked up beside her. They both looked at each other, then smiled and nodded. Kyuubi looked to Tsunade and then to Jiraiya curiously. "What?" he asked and stopped fanning. "Why are you looking at me like that?" he started to slowly back away for they were grinning in a way people do when they have marvelous, cruel plans in mind. He felt his back hit a dead end.

"Have you ever learned to… dance?" Tsunade asked darkly and smirked.

Kyuubi's eyes widened in shock and then to a look of unspeakable fear. "N-No." he choked.

Jiraiya chuckled evilly. "Start learning."

Chapter End 

Next chapter should be up, enjoy :). Oh yeah, and please review.

OMG I Lied, There Really Was A Next Time! And Now There's Another Next Time!


	13. Second Sequel Part Two

Here's the second part, please review and enjoy!

There are no more funny things I can think of to say so that's all I will say and there's nothing you can do about it. I.D.O.N. AKA: I don't own Naruto

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 13

Second Sequel Part 2

Demon Dancing

"NO, YOU WON'T TAKE ME ALIVE! NOOOOOO!" Kyuubi screamed as Jiraiya and Tsunade dragged him into an empty room to practice. He grabbed onto the side of the doorway but Tsunade yanked on him harder, ripping some of doorway apart and into Kyuubi's hands. The room was round and had shiny peach floors with diamonds around a circle pattern in the middle of the room. There were full-length mirrors on every side and a small chandelier hanging in the middle of the room. Tsunade was going to teach him since both she and Jiraiya had decided that Kyuubi go to the Dance Ball on Thursday. Jiraiya asked Naruto if it was ok for Kyuubi to come out on the day of the Dance and Naruto had happily agreed. For one he hated Dances, everyone was all mushy there, and second because he wanted to cruelly torture Kyuubi. "I SWEAR TO KAMI YOU'LL REGRET THIS! NOOOOOO!" Kyuubi threatened and tried to get out of the two legendary Sannin's tight grips, who laughed at this comment, not thinking much of it at the time.

"Heh, heh. Kyuubi, when you step out of this room you'll be a changed fox, I guarantee it!" Jiraiya reported evilly and let go of Kyuubi, Tsunade did the same.

"Forget it!" Kyuubi snarled as he sat cross-legged on the ground, his arms folded. "Demons just DON'T dance!"

Tsunade heaved Kyuubi up. "I'm sure they do some sort of dancing." She suggested and Kyuubi fell silent so she continued, "And besides, your not leaving this room until you learn to dance." She could have sworn she saw a tear run down Kyuubi's face.

He mushroom huffed and glared at Jiraiya. "I'm not doing anything with HIM in here." He growled and Jiraiya sighed, then left, closing the door quietly behind him.

Tsunade slapped her hands together. "Alrighty then, lets get started!"

The training was long and hard, Kyuubi thought it would all be easier if they just made up their own moves but no, they had to learn things step by step, bit by bit. What's worse been that Tsunade wasn't letting him take any brakes until he learned the entire thing. Jiraiya sat outside the room, slumped in a chair and writing his Icha, Icha Paradise. He had taken to writing things about Yaoi in his story as well as strait people, he basically got the idea from Dosu who smothered Kyuubi with hugs ever second he laid eyes on the legendary fox demon. He thought he was doing pretty well so far. It would bring a smile to anybody if they read this piece of shear gold…

'_I don't know what I'd do without you, Kira! You're my bread and butter!' Yuki spoke softly in his ear._

'_Oh Yuki, me too. You're the cream in my coffee and the cherry on my Sunday!' Kira replied and touched Yuki gently on the cheek, his hot breath warming up his weather beaten face. Kira then lifted his hand over to Yuki's nice smooth…_

The door opened and Tsunade walked out, slapping her hands together happily. "Walla, my work here is done."

Jiraiya slammed his book shut and peeked into the practice room, Kyuubi was laying on his back, arms spread out and his head lolled to the side. "I'm ruined." He kept muttering to himself over and over. "I've lost all form of dignity I might have once contained, its all gone. My life as a fierce nine-tailed demon is over and my life as a tamed zoo animal has just begun, oh joy."

Jiraiya shook his head and faced Tsunade who nodded and smirked. "He's ready."

_**----On Thursday----**_

It was the only time Kyuubi dreaded having control over Naruto, he really didn't want to but it seemed he didn't have a choice. As soon as he woke up Jiraiya pulled him out to some store and got him some really hideous clothes. Well, only Kyuubi thought they were hideous, all of the girls in the store nearly jumped on him when he stepped out of the changing rooms. Then it was off to fetch Tsunade and they were headed to the Dance Ball, which Kyuubi shuddered at the thought of dancing. He and Jiraiya were walking to Hokage Tower where Tsunade was just finishing up some paper work for the village's monthly bills.

"Humph, you seem to enjoy torturing me don't you perverted hermit?" Kyuubi growled as he walked along side of Jiraiya.

"Aw, come on Kyuubi, its not that bad."

"Will there be food there?"

"…Yes"

Kyuubi eyed Jiraiya. "What kind, Jiraiya?" He urged.

He didn't make eye contact. "Vegetables." He answered quietly.

"Damn it Jiraiya! Now I've got to smell rotting tomatoes and carrots all night long, I don't know if my nose can take it!" Kyuubi growled as they walked down the hallway to Tsunade's office.

Just as Jiraiya was about to nock on the door it flung open, reviling the Hokage in glittery silver formal wear. The dress went down to her ankles. "Hellos to both my dates!" she greeted giddily. "I just chugged ten cups of expresso and I'm wired, lets get this party started!" she reported and started marching down the hallway and out the front door.

Jiraiya looked to Kyuubi who looked back at him. "I hope there isn't booze there." Jiraiya pleaded and Kyuubi shuddered, remembering the last experience he had with women and alcohol, not a pretty mach.

When they got to the tall building the Dance Ball took place in, Tsunade already was there and having fun, so much for bringing her to the place when she just ran there herself. Kyuubi stepped in through the front doors with Jiraiya and looked around. The place was huge and looked just about the same as the practice room had except for the long rows of stinky vegetable filled tables and the soft mango colored walls that had no corners, the room was a circle. The thing that really stood out though was the huge chandelier that hung in the middle of the room, its diamonds sparkled all around and glowed lightly from the light coming through the sunroof at the top of the ceiling. The slow jazz music and the boring ballroom dance moves however be what brought the room's effect down to a zero.

Jiraiya didn't seem to notice and started hitting on all the girls he set his eyes on. "Oh, what's your name?" he asked one blond girl in a small skirt.

"I'm Mitsuki… how old are you anyway?" she asked out of the blue and Jiraiya shifted uncomfortably.

Kyuubi walked up to them. "Just count his wrinkles and find out." He said sarcastically and Jiraiya lunged for him angrily.

"That's for trees you blasted fox!" he snarled and whacked Kyuubi over the head, who in turn whacked him over the head harder and kicked him in the shins.

He walked away from a twitching Jiraiya and smirked. At least he made some of the girl's laugh, because this place needed spicing up. He looked around, people did look like they seemed to have fun, but to Kyuubi he understood what this party wanted more of, a change in dancing, and in music.

He ran quickly over to the vegetable table, slithering through the crowds of slow boring dancing people, then he grabbed the white cloth that was draped over the table and pulled all the disgusting tomatoes and carrots off the surface. He jumped up onto the top of the table and walked over to the crackling old jazz record revolving inside the machine. He then flooded the record with his chakura, slowing it down to a low demented murmur. People now had stopped dancing and were looking at what was causing all the noise. Kyuubi made it so his chakura revolved around the record in different orders and movements to make a possible tune out of the low muffled jazz. And then finally he wiped whatever he had remembered from Tsunade's torturous dancing lessons and started filling in the blanks with his own moves, still taking the basic steps from the boring ball room dancing paces, but tweaking them a bit to fit them of his own interests.

Jiraiya and Tsunade stood next to one another speechless, watching as the new demonic dancing erupted from cheering people all around them, the new demon-nated music blaring loudly. And that's when they finally understood what Kyuubi had meant when he said they would both regret teaching him dance moves.

The End Again

Few, I'm so tired, its two thirty in the morning. I just had to write out this fic and post it up, so please review!

Holy Shitaki Mushrooms, There Was Another Next Time!


	14. Naruto's Diary

I don't own the SahoidifShaggUs9 show but it's a very good show, you should watch it sometime… -gets a nasty look from Masashi Kishimoto- eep, oh yeah… I don't own Naruto either! -Glares at Masashi and mouths, "One day Masashi, one day"-

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 14

Naruto's Diary

Hey there Diary chan,

Hello, this is Naruto Uzumaki writing in you and damn it, does Kyuubi do some frightening things in my absence! In here, I'm going to write about how embarrassed I am to have a giant demon fox living inside of me that acts like a flippen two year old! I mean, do you know how _hard_ it is to wake up after that things been roaming around your village the whole day before?

I'll be walking down the street and I get stopped by people I don't even know telling me that they want to knock my brains loose and pour my liver down the drain! And I'm asking myself, "Now, what the hell did Kyuubi do this time? This isn't the type of attention I want!" I'm sure I'd be dead right now if it wasn't for Jiraiya and this Tora girl and some sound ninja (I'm sure was killed in episode fifty four)… er, I mean I don't know _anything_ about a Naruto show!

Anyway, I hear Gaara let Shukaku out one time and I can't even imagine the utter humiliation the two of us must have gone through! THEY'RE USING OUR BODIES FOR THEIR EVIL DEEDS GOD DAMN IT! Ahem… kinda lost it there, hehe. The very first month Kyuubi was let out I hear Chouji nearly killed himself. He had gone into spiraling depression after losing some eating contest to Kyuubi or something like that, I don't know… but really, an eating contest (what the hell do they do in their spare time)? Well anyway it happened and Shikamaru found Chouji in his room ready to commit suicide, luckily he was able to calm him down, and there was alittle drama but everything is O.K. now.

Oh yeah, and one time I even woke up with an ENORMOUS headache and Jiraiya, the old pervy sage wouldn't even look me in the eye and some weird girls had tracked me down and were hitting on me or whatever you want to call it! Later on I found Kyuubi and Jiraiya had gone to a nightclub the day before and everything was filled with alcohol! MY HEAD WAS FLIPPEN KILLING ME THANKS TO THAT OVERLY LARGE FUR BALL! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!

…Sorry, I have a bit of pent up rage that I haven't been letting out lately, I really don't know how much more I can take but I'll have to deal with it. So yeah…

Later,

(:Naruto:) 

Chapter End

GASP, I'm not even going to bother saying there will never be a next time…


	15. Gaara's Diary

…I wish I may I wish I might, have the wish I wished tonight, "I WISH NARUTO WAS MIIIINE!" -sniff- Tis not though, and never shall be.

Kyuubi Madness

Chapter 15

Gaara's Diary

Dear Diary,

Hi again, this is Gaara… Yesterday I got back from visiting Konoha, where Kyuubi had been out (he gets let out of Naruto once a month, Konoha is very nice). Anyhow, it was a very interesting day it began when I agreed to let Shukaku play outside with his friend, Kyuubi while I had a nice doze (which was extremely pleasant might I put in, dreaming of widdle bunnies and…) however when I came to, Temari and Kankuro both told me in every detail possible what horrors Shukaku did in my body!

He kissed the Tora girl (which was my first kiss, and probably my last, and I wasn't even there to witness it!). I was informed that I played hopscotch in an ally way where there were cats and danced with Temari, and Kankuro was a cheerleader or something creepy like that. When I asked why I had bruises all over my body they told me that I had fought against Kyuubi for Tora and there was a rain cloud and some Itachi guy, whom again? Anyway, I'm not one hundred percent sure what happened that Saturday after noon but I know that it would have been a sight to see, I'm positive.

It seems Temari and Kankuro had a good enough time though, they even asked me to let him out again and I just couldn't pass up a good opportunity to have dreams about little white Bunnies and sugary Candy Corn… Ahem, however I'm kind of worried what Shukaku might do in my absence. I said I'd let him come out tonight so I guess I'll have to find out tomorrow.

I will write again Dairy. Yours truly,

(:Gaara:)

----------------------------------------------

BWAHAHAHA, OI GAARA! YOU WRITE IN A DIARY? HAHAHAHAHAHA. That's so totally lame you little worm, I'll never let you forget this when you're good and old! MWAHAHA! This is gold, pure gold! AHAHAHAHA! And guess what, your going to wake up naked tomorrow, that's what! I'm playing _STRIP POKER, _AND I SUCK!

Chapter end

OMG! There really was a- oh forget it…


End file.
